JT on BGR

I saw two senior-citizen/ retiree aged couples nagging at each other at the bus stop. The way they made a fuss over silly things was quite amusing. I wonder if they ever did expect themselves to be fussing up like this in the days of their youth, where love was still hanging around in the air everytime they met.

Relationships. BGR. I'm about to say "What-a-bother". haha. Given the ultimate stubborn personality that I have and the emotional irrationality that erupts once in a while too often as mood swings (if you ever get to be hit my one of my mood waves, you'd sorta know what I mean.), I can't imagine making commitments and keeping to them. haha. It sounds all too much like being tied down.

I think it's gota do with me wanting to do things my way. A sort of individuality and independence or self-sufficiency that I'd like to cling on to. Pride in self? Maybe. Perhaps, on a deeper level, it a sort of self-protection against being vulnerable to and being hurt by other people. Marriage = more of that vulnerability. Having family = getting teenage monsters in due time who'll chew off a piece of your heart each day. (I admit, the statements with all the '=' signs are are overly negative)

No, I have never been hurt in a BGR kinda relationship coz I was never there to begin with. But I have seen how BGR can be so potent and deadly to those in it, those around it and those connected to it. I somehow have been blinded by certain somethings to see little good coming out of it.

Oh what pessimism.